The Importance of Anniversary Dates
Written by Braiden on August 18, 2011
Today is the anniversary date of my parents. They were married almost 60 years and my father is still with us to help celebrate and commemorate this very special day.
I was moved by the story of a local Seattle couple who were married for a whopping 74 years, then died just 15 hours apart.
According to the story in The Seattle Times, Bob and Kay Sarver “were together every day of their lives except when he was in the Navy.”
Bob died at age 92; Kay was 93. They married in 1937.
“I never thought of them as individuals. I always thought of them as one,” daughter-in-law Sandy Sarver said. “They were joined at the hip.”
It’s an inspiring story, and a marriage we could all learn a lesson (or three) from.
Cheers to the important anniversaries in all our lives.
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Five Minutes for Forgiveness
Written by Dawn Faust on August 16, 2011
This is a letter that has been on my mind for at least the past 18 months.
It is an open letter of forgiveness to the man I was married to and who ultimately left me, two weeks after my second lumpectomy and eight weeks after I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
If I had five minutes of his time today……..this is what I would say.
First and foremost, I forgive you. I have taken a considerable amount of time to examine what happened when we parted and I have forgiven you for it all.
I will never think or say what you did was right or even humane. But, nonetheless, I forgive you.
I know that what you did, you did out of fear.
You were afraid of loss……who isn’t?
You were afraid of losing our business, and any financial stability you had hoped to have.
Without health insurance, you were right in assuming the financial burden that was to come, with cancer treatment,would be immense. It has been.
You were afraid to meet the same cancer demon that had taken your Mother 20 years earlier.
Even though it had been over 20 years, the pain of that loss was refreshed by my cancer diagnosis.
You did not want to deal with what you knew was to follow: The loss of hair, health, vitality, etc.
Consequently, you shifted all the loss over on to me.
I took 100% of the loss.
What you did not realize was that by shifting over all the loss, you also shifted over all the blessing brought by the loss.
You see, you gave me a gift and you steeled within me something I never even knew I possessed. An IRON will to LIVE!!
The intensity of the pain I experienced–through time and forgiveness–has become the pure joy, purpose, and passion that I now have.
It was the excruciating pain that I experienced that gave me the cues and clues to figure out what I wanted the rest of my long life to look like.
Understand, I am not being facetious or sarcastic when I say, “thank you.” I am being quite sincere.
I find myself in frequent, fervent prayer for you.
God has given me mercy and compassion when I look in your direction.
I see that you are no more lost than I was two years ago, and God has a plan for your healing as well.
As always, I pray that his will be completed to perfection in your life.
Amen, From Dawn Faust.
Editor’s Note: Dawn Faust is a social-networking and marketing expert and breast-cancer survivor living and working in central Florida. Please visit her website for additional thoughts on life after cancer.
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Sending You Lots of Love, Mom
Written by Braiden on August 13, 2011
Today is the sixth anniversary of my mother’s death.
Julia Looper Rex was, in many ways, the inspiration for the Five More Minutes With concept and website.
So thank you for that, and for all the other wonderful things you did for me while you were still alive.
This is one of my favorite photographs of our family, taken at Chris’s Seafood Restaurant and Fish Market in Ocean City, New Jersey. We ate many memorable meals there (fried flounder and french fries was our favorite dish!) while watching the boats in the marina.
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Opening Your Heart Once Again
Written by "Anne" on August 10, 2011
Darling Bo-Bo, November 22, 1988-August 10, 2004
Today is the seventh anniversary of the death of our beloved cat, Bo-Bo. He died at 4:35 p.m. on August 10, 2004, after a several-month, and seemingly interminable bout with what we think was stomach cancer. I’ve written about it before on this blog, and so has my husband, Spencer in his moving tribute.
Even up to the very end, he pleased his “Mom” (me) by jumping down for one last bite of kibble from his food bowl.
When the horrible knock at the front door came–the beneficent veternarian who came to our home to put him to sleep–our hearts died along with Bo-Bo’s.
We’ve never gotten another feline. None could compare to our one and only. And, selfishly, we couldn’t face the inevitable–the moment we’d have our hearts broken all over again.
But I love those people who can put the death of a beloved companion animal behind them and give love a second chance.
Here’s the lovely recounting of a pet adoption undertaken by a dear friend and respected colleague of mine. . .a woman who’s become like a second mother to me since my own mom passed away six years ago.
She’s a very private person, so asked me not to use her name. But here’s what “Anne” had to say:
I definitely understand about the feelings of loss. We had three kitties and one lived to 20; the other two made it to 16.
We lost the last two sisters within months of each other and it was very, very difficult for me.
I haven’t had any since ours died about 10 yrs ago. That’s probably why it’s taken me so long to reach out again.
But we have had a visiting “lover” in the form of a neighbor’s cat (loving Maine Coon Cat – huge) who thought our house belonged to him. His visits helped assuage my desire to have kitties.
I think our visiting love sponge is cutting back due to age and weather – we rarely see him.
I’ve been thinking about it ever since I had the stray kitty in my tree last June – unfortunately he arrived at the bottom of the barrel in my husband’s medical treatment.
And with his various side effects (irritable, really different person) I couldn’t consider bringing in a cat, much as I wanted to, so I found a good home for the cat.
Last week I stumbled across photos of my June kitty which reawakened my desire for kitty/kitties (because we do travel a fair amount I wanted 2 kitties for company for each other).
So Saturday I went to a Kitty Open House – after researching the on-line availabilities.
My two targets disappeared within minutes of the doors opening.
I was delayed by a detour caused by an accident of some sort, so they directed me to the Shelter.
Oh my, what lovely choices there were!
But one little tabby stood out – she started meowing the moment I walked in, stuck out her paw to pet me – I was sold.
Checked her out and was just finishing up when the guy at the front desk asked if I had any interest in the cat who was in the cage above.
I took a brief look – the suggested feline was way above my head so not easy to see, plus she was pinned against the back wall.
I said I just wasn’t thinking that way at the moment, and couldn’t make a snap decision.
No one had told me they were sisters – wouldn’t have wanted to break them up.
Thought about it and watched my little tabby as she adjusted, and wondered if it would have been easier for her if she had someone she knew with her.
Woke up Sunday and decided to go back and get the other cat–her sister!!!
She turned out to be lovely smokey-gray/white mix (part Maine Coon) and very, very lovey.
She adjusted very easily, either because she’s dominant or just more outgoing by nature.
Kitties are just so lovely.
