Five Minutes for Forgiveness

Written by Dawn Faust on August 16, 2011

This is a letter that has been on my mind for at least the past 18 months.

It is an open letter of forgiveness to the man I was married to and who ultimately left me, two weeks after my second lumpectomy and eight weeks after I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

If I had five minutes of his time today……..this is what I would say.

First and foremost, I forgive you. I have taken a considerable amount of time to examine what happened when we parted and I have forgiven you for it all.

I will never think or say what you did was right or even humane. But, nonetheless, I forgive you.

I know that what you did, you did out of fear.

You were afraid of loss……who isn’t?

You were afraid of losing our business, and any financial stability you had hoped to have.

Without health insurance, you were right in assuming the financial burden that was to come, with cancer treatment,would be immense. It has been.

You were afraid to meet the same cancer demon that had taken your Mother 20 years earlier.

Even though it had been over 20 years, the pain of that loss was refreshed by my cancer diagnosis.

You did not want to deal with what you knew was to follow: The loss of hair, health, vitality, etc.

Consequently, you shifted all the loss over on to me.

I took 100% of the loss.

What you did not realize was that by shifting over all the loss, you also shifted over all the blessing brought by the loss.

You see, you gave me a gift and you steeled within me something I never even knew I possessed. An IRON will to LIVE!!

The intensity of the pain I experienced–through time and forgiveness–has become the pure joy, purpose, and passion that I now have.

It was the excruciating pain that I experienced that gave me the cues and clues to figure out what I wanted the rest of my long life to look like.

Understand, I am not being facetious or sarcastic when I say, “thank you.” I am being quite sincere.

I find myself in frequent, fervent prayer for you.

God has given me mercy and compassion when I look in your direction.

I see that you are no more lost than I was two years ago, and God has a plan for your healing as well.

As always, I pray that his will be completed to perfection in your life.

Amen, From Dawn Faust.

Editor’s Note: Dawn Faust is a social-networking and marketing expert and breast-cancer survivor living and working in central Florida. Please visit her website for additional thoughts on life after cancer.