Memory of Mom: Things I Want To Tell My Mother

Written by Marylin Naomi (Shepherd) Warner on May 11, 2012

Marylin Naomi (Shepherd) Warner is a writing coach, editor, and freelance writer who keeps a blog entitled,  “Things I Want To Tell My Mother,” in order to help her mother–Mary Elizabeth (Hoover) Shepherd–with her Alzheimer’s Disease.

What an inspiring idea, Marylin! Thanks for your submission to our Memory of Mom (MoM) contest. 

My mother is 93, losing her memories in bits and pieces as her dementia advances.

I made her a promise three years ago when my father died, that each month I would drive from Colorado to southeastern Kansas (1,300 miles round trip) and stay a few days with her in her assisted living facility.

During those 32 monthly visits, we have shared driving adventures to her favorite places, and taken friends who’ve been part of her life for years out for meals or coffee.

During the years, though, Mom’s memories became more and more lost in a haze.

I was with her each month, but also losing more of her each month.

So what I did was create a blog, “Things I Want To Tell My Mother,” so I record stories (with pictures) of the big and small events of Mom’s life, the simple and the significant, the poignant and the funny.

This blog will be the “five more minutes” of Mom’s connection with her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and they will know the woman she once was.

When a blog post touches them or triggers a memory, they leave a comment with more details, and the ongoing living story takes hold.

Now when I visit each month and read aloud a few entries and show her pictures, Mom will smile and say, “What an amazing lady your friend must be.”

She’s right. My friend–my mother–was and still is an amazing lady.

And even though she will forget, we will remember.

Memory of Mom: Trying to Be the Son You Wanted Me to Be

Written by Donald Hoofard, Sr. on May 10, 2012

Donald Hoofard, Sr., is a former Federal Fugitive Recovery Agent (bounty hunter), now turned fiction writer (author of the Dane series) and editor at the Hoofard Agency in Jasper, Texas. He started writing thanks to his mother’s final request. 

Donald told me, “My mother, on her death bed, asked me to write my life’s story, saying that I had a life few have ever known and should write about that life. I gave her my word I would do as she had asked, but put it off for almost eight years. Now I am a published author thanks to her last request.”

Congratulations, Donald!

I was not the best of sons.

She may not have been the best of mothers.

But if I had five more minutes with her, I would say this much.

“Mom, I hope that all is well now that you’re in heaven and in no more pain.

“I just wanted you to know that I have taken your last words to me to heart, and written the story of my life as you wanted me to do.

“I may not have been the son you always wanted me to be, but I am trying still. Don’t give up on me yet.

“It is you who has helped me to finally know myself and put my life on paper at last.

“I tell of my life and think of you often through the pages to their very end.

“I love you. I miss you.

“I hope that one day when my time comes, that I again am with you.”

Memory of Mom: Sharing a Daughter’s Birth

Written by Maelyn Lessard on April 15, 2011

My best memory that I share with my Mom is when I gave birth to my daughter.

I called when I was in labor but I went fast.

I was living in North Carolina and she was in Melbourne, Florida.

She drove all night and arrived at 7a.m.

I was sitting in bed holding my new baby girl and she walked in crying.

I cry thinking of the moment we all held each other for the first time.

It is a moment you cannot describe because it was filled with so much love and emotion.

We have since moved to Melbourne and have shared many things, but that moment is truly just ours.